by tcoates | Feb 14, 2019 | Podcasts
You can find Michelle here:
Paley Rothman Attorneys at Law
Michelle Chapin on LinkedIn
(301)951-9353
[email protected]
Show Notes:
[01:53] Michelle advises clients on how to leave their assets at death and how to protect themselves if they are incapacitated. She also helps clients with minor children name guardians in their will or if they are incapacitated.
[02:33] She also helps clients who have modest means who need trusts.
[03:10] Everyone needs an estate plan whether they are married or divorced. You should want to leave your estate to someone in particular.
[03:53] Estate planning is state-specific. Michelle represents Maryland, DC, and Virginia. It’s best to have local counsel wherever you reside.
[04:54] When people aren’t getting divorced the estate plan is a joint representation.
[07:26] Conflict has to be waived in order to represent just one of the spouses.
[07:55] An estate plan isn’t just your will. It could also include an irrevocable trust where your next named trustee could step in for your capacity.
[08:41] People also require a financial power of attorney and a medical directive. You also want to update beneficiary designations for retirement benefits and life insurance.
[10:23] A divorce usually affects all of these documents, because people normally name their spouse in every position.
[10:48] Some states have laws where if your spouse is in a fiduciary position and you get divorced that position will be revoked.
[11:08] You don’t want to rely on state law. You want to have your own plan and do what’s best for your needs.
[11:28] A fiduciary is a person that you’ve named to act in your best interest.
[14:38] Proactively update your destinations upon divorce.
[16:18] You can revoke a will by tearing it up. You can also create a new will and include language that revokes your older will. It’s still a good idea to destroy your old will or tear it up.
[18:41] They hold their clients wills free of charge, so they don’t accidentally get revoked. A fireproof box is the best place to keep a will.
[20:26] If you divorce, your Inherited property isn’t divided. The augmented estate – if you disinherit a spouse, they can make a claim against your estate when you die.
[22:26] A prenuptial agreement can be used to keep property separate after divorce.
[22:49] The estate can be made a gift for the person’s children and put in a trust.
[23:40] If people are separated, they need to remove their spouse as the fiduciary of their estate plan.
[24:54] A claim can be made against the estate, and the estate can’t close until the claim is resolved.
[26:15] You can name whoever you want as the guardian of your children, but the biological parent is always the default guardian. You would have to show something in court proving that this person is unfit.
[28:09] When getting divorced, it might be a good idea to change financial advisors.
[28:40] You can update your plan possibly before your divorce.
[30:23] It’s crucial that people think about their estate plan as part of their divorce.
[31:25] Take control of your own estate plan and don’t let these things fall through the cracks.
Do you have any topics that you would like me to cover in future shows? Let me know in the comments below. Don’t forget to subscribe to the show, and if you are enjoying what you hear please leave a review on iTunes.
Links and Resources:
Paley Rothman Attorneys at Law
Michelle Chapin on LinkedIn
(301)951-9353
[email protected]
by tcoates | Jan 17, 2019 | Podcasts, Uncategorized
Happy New Year. Welcome to the very first episode of The Divorce Chronicles for 2019. I’m excited for what’s to come in 2019. With the passing of President Trump’s new tax law called The Tax Cuts and Jobs Acts of 2017, there are dramatic changes in regards to alimony payments. Today, I’m going to provide clarity about what this new tax law means for you.
Show Notes:
[01:30] The mere mention of taxes usually puts me to sleep, but this Tax Act is anything but boring.
[01:39] This new tax law repeal a law that has been in effect for 75 years.
[01:59] Alimony or spousal support is is Money Paid from one former spouse to the other. This would be the payor paying to the payee.
[02:28] This could be for a specified time or indefinitely. Alimony is usually paid on a monthly basis.
[02:31] For the past 75 years, alimony has been tax deductible for the payor and the payee has to pay taxes on it.
[02:45] This was the law up until December 31st 2018.
[03:06] How TCJA has impacted alimony.
[03:19] Divorce decrees executed before December 31st 2018 are not affected by the new tax laws.
[03:47] There is an exception. If the agreement is modified after December 31st 2018, then TCJA will apply.
[04:58] Let’s say a spouse is making $200,000 annually and pays $50,000 a year to their former spouse who is earning $40,000 a year.
[05:23] The spouse will only have to pay taxes on that $150,000 they earned.
[05:45] The recipient spouse will pay taxes on $90,000.
[06:39] With the new law, the spouse earning $200,000 and paying $50,000 is no longer allowed to deduct that $50,000 that they are paying to the other spouse.
[07:02] The recipient spouse will only have to pay taxes on their annual salary of $40,000.
[07:38] I hope these examples with actual figures provides a more definitive explanation of the new tax laws.
[07:47] If you execute an alimony agreement before December 31st 2018, the payer can deduct the alimony amount and the payee will pay taxes on it.
[08:24] Agreements executed after December 31st 2018 are governed by the new tax laws. This means alimony paid is no longer a deduction. Spouses that receive alimony no longer have to pay taxes on it.
[08:51] All of the old agreements executed before December 31st 2018 are still valid and executable.
[09:03] There is an exception if the agreement is modified after that date.
Do you have any topics that you would like me to cover in future shows? Let me know in the comments below. Don’t forget to subscribe to the show, and if you are enjoying what you hear please leave a review on iTunes.
Links and Resources:
The Tax Cuts and Jobs Acts of 2017
by tcoates | Dec 11, 2018 | Uncategorized
You can find Robin Tucker here:
Robin Tucker
Show Notes:
[01:51] Robin is a coach and a therapist. She works primarily with men and women who are navigating the divorce process. She also provides parent coaching for divorced parents. She also works with couples.
[02:18] Robin is located in Northwest Washington DC. She has in-person clients and she also works remotely with clients. She also runs groups in person.
[03:30] She works with couples who are just beginning to dissolve their marriage, and she also works with parents to help negotiate the divorce process, and how they envision their connection through the difficult process.
[05:31] When people first come into Robin’s office they are usually shocked and kind of in a numb phase. The first thing she does is to take an assessment for safety.
[06:29] Then they begin processing the news of getting divorced and what that means for them.
[06:38] Most people go into automatic pilot. They show up, but they aren’t really present.
[07:40] Clients are initially in survival mode. They are really just focusing on what they can do to get through the next day.
[08:29] Sometimes clients are fixated on their ex-partner and what happened. It takes time to process this experience and move forward.
[09:42] Once Robin finds out how the client is feeling and where they are in the process, she can sit down and delve into their feelings. She encourages clients to focus on what is more important for them.
[12:12] With couples they need to express how they are feeling without being defensive or feeling like they need to fix things.
[13:05] With domestic violence Robin’s primary concern is making sure that they have a safe place to live. Do they need a restraining order? Is there something that needs to be put in place so they can function safely?
[14:28] Violence can escalate when a partner leaves a relationship, so Robin encourages victims to have a safe place where they aren’t accessible. She also assesses whether to report to the police.
[15:22] She also works with attorneys and other mental health professionals. She is there to fully support her clients. She might work with older children but not younger children.
[16:34] The first stage clients often go through is denial. The next phase is to process the pain or the experience of abandonment.
[19:39] It’s rare, but sometimes couples reconcile. It’s human nature to remember the value of that which you are about to lose.
[21:39] Difficult aspects of the process include sharing custody, having to see a spouse that you have been hurt by, having to maintain civil contact, and pressure from extended family. Holidays are also challenging.
[23:27] There is light at the end of the tunnel though. People almost invariably find happiness again.
[24:05] It’s imperative for clients to meet with someone and talk with someone when things feel hopeless. If someone is isolated and ruminating, it’s hard to imagine that things could change.
[25:06] Sometimes people overextend themselves financially during the holidays. Be mindful of over spending to compensate for your loss.
[26:46] Identify two or three really good friends who you can be completely honest with. Take advantages of free resources in groups in the area such as 12-step programs and Al-Anon. Church groups and volunteering can also be helpful.
[29:21] Part of the process is getting clients to change their story. Robin likes to use the yes and technique.
[30:25] Robin is launching Divorce Recovery 1.0 for men and women at the end of January. This group will help you get much-needed perspective that will help you move forward.
Do you have any topics that you would like me to cover in future shows? Let me know in the comments below. Don’t forget to subscribe to the show, and if you are enjoying what you hear please leave a review on iTunes.
Links and Resources:
Al-Anon
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by tcoates | Oct 9, 2018 | Podcasts
You can find Sara here:
DC Volunteer Lawyers Project
Show Notes:
[02:41] This is the 10th year of DCVLP providing high-quality pro bono legal services to domestic violence victims.
[03:12] They focus on representing domestic violence survivors in obtaining protection orders and ongoing custody and divorce litigation.
[03:32] Their lawyers also serve as court appointed guardians for at risk children.
[04:12] Sara has been practicing law for 15 years. She also has a degree in social work, and she feels her experience as a trained mediator is critical.
[05:21] Sara was one of Tracey’s first DCVLP supervisors. She was a wonderful example and a delight to work with.
[06:11] Domestic violence has many different faces. The definition is violent or aggressive behavior that occurs between two people who have an intimate partner relationship.
[06:59] The violence transcends all races and genders and can be physical, emotional, or sexual.
[07:32] There is frequently an element of control with abusers. This can include isolation or controlling where the victim goes or how they spend money.
[08:20] Abusers can be master manipulators. They can appear incredibly nice and respectful.
[09:15] They can appear wonderful until they get behind closed doors.
[10:25] The cycle of domestic violence. On average it takes seven attempts before the victim finally leaves the abuser. This is because there is an incident, apologies, calmness, then another incident. There can also be issues with finding a place to live or religious or cultural factors.
[11:42] Isolation by abusers has long-term implications.
[13:25] Boys who grow up witnessing domestic violence are twice as likely to be abusers when they are adults. Girls in the same situation are twice as likely to be abused.
[14:16] Victims are male and female. Relationships are hetero sexual or same sex relationships or transgendered.
[15:31] For men, there is a level of embarrassment from being the victim.
[16:18] A restraining order can give immediate relief. Individuals can file for divorce and custody of children.
[18:24] After an incident occurs, the victim can go to the courthouse and file paperwork for a protection order. You can ask for them to stay away from you, vacate your home, financial relief, and more.
user
[22:00] The divorce process. Depending on whether the domestic violence has been adjudicated or not, it impacts division of property, custody, and other aspects of the divorce.
[24:11] Allegations depend on whether there has been a finding by the court. If there has been a finding by the court, the law does favor the parent who has been the victim.
[26:57] Protective orders can be denied because there may not be a witness, or corroborating evidence, and it comes down to a he said she said.
[29:18] Manipulative abusers sometimes file counter allegations against the victim. This is a very calculated form of abuse.
[31:49] A subpoena is a request for evidence from a third party.
[32:45] Victims frequently change their minds and decide not to go forward at the last minute.
[36:19] If you are a victim of domestic violence reach out for help, because there are people who will help.
Do you have any topics that you would like me to cover in future shows? Let me know in the comments below. Don’t forget to subscribe to the show, and if you are enjoying what you hear please leave a review on iTunes.
Links and Resources:
The National Domestic Violence Hotline
National Coalition Against Domestic Violence
NCADV State Coalitions
Getting Help with Domestic Violence
Childhood Domestic Violence
by tcoates | Sep 18, 2018 | Podcasts
Family magistrate Bibi Berry is here today. Before joining the judiciary, Magistrate Berry was a principal member and my former partner at the law firm of Paley Rothman in Bethesda, Maryland. She devoted most of her legal career to the practice of family law. She is a dear friend and a very smart and experienced family law practitioner.
She received her undergraduate degree from Howard University and her law degree from Georgetown University Law Center. She has served as a faculty member for the Family Law University for Sitting Judges and Magistrates, and the American Institute of CPAs expert witness workshops on business valuations. If she’s not in the courtroom, she could be on the golf course.
You can find Bibi here:
Judges & Magistrates
Show Notes:
[04:30] Bibi has practiced family law in the state of Maryland for 15 years.
[05:17] She recently became a family magistrate with the Maryland Judiciary in Montgomery County.
[05:49] Magistrates and judges are very similar. Bibi serves a dual function to help clear the docket and help advise the judges. They conduct preliminary hearings.
[07:35] They conduct evidentiary and non-evidentiary hearings. They make recommendations as to what should occur.
[09:11] Fact finders have to parse through all of the noise and get to what is truly relevant to the case.
[09:54] About 60% of Bibi’s litigants are unrepresented.
[10:43] If you are going to be involved in a case, it is absolutely beneficial to seek representation.
[11:20] Your attorney will know the law, the rules of procedure, and be able to navigate through the court.
[12:35] They will know the terminology and how to put together a case that is persuasive to the judge.
[13:26] It’s not a good idea to represent yourself and be emotionally tied to what you are going through.
[14:20] To navigate the judicial system, find available resources that will help you educate yourself. It’s also a good idea to look for pro bono representation. Educate yourself as much as possible and use the courthouse library.
[16:45] You can also look into hiring an attorney or a limited scope of time. Also look at the self-help centers located at many courthouses.
[19:40] At least have a consult with an attorney. Things are a little less daunting when you spend a couple hours with an experienced attorney. They can talk to you about issues, expectations, and the process. They will also give you an idea of what information you will need to present to the court.
[21:28] Read your paperwork before you go to the initial hearing. You can give a brief opening statement and present evidence and facts. You will be put under oath. If you are the moving party, you have the burden of proving. Find relevant facts.
[24:28] Evidence includes witnesses, documents, and other items.
[24:57] Objections are rules that preclude certain types of evidence from being presented to the court. One of these objections is hearsay.
[28:07] Children aren’t usually brought in to testify, because we don’t want them involved in the legal process unless they really need to be there. The child should have an attorney to relay their perspective.
[30:31] Objections concerning relevancy. It’s important to object to any evidence that is not relevant to the case.
[32:09] Making an objection because a person is lying is not a proper objection. Instead, you would address it by telling the judge that it is not true when it is your turn to speak.
[33:09] Any litigant, especially self represented litigants should be prepared and write out what they want to get across to the court in advance.
[35:03] It’s important to make sure that you connect the facts of the case with the law. This is another reason why it’s important to do your due diligence or speak with an attorney.
[37:41] Dress professionally when you’re in court. The judge will be assessing your demeanor and your character. You should do anything that will help tip the scale in your favor. Be punctual. Be respectful of the court.
[40:59] Don’t make gestures or roll your eyes when the opposing person is speaking.
[42:11] Judges are somewhat detached, so they can be open to both sides of the aisle.
[42:54] Litigants should sit there quietly and listen to what is being said.
[43:32] If you don’t tell the truth, the court will be less inclined to believe other things that you say. You can’t change the facts. If you lie on the stand or misrepresent something, you could tarnish your credibility and ruin your case.
Do you have any topics that you would like me to cover in future shows? Let me know in the comments below. Don’t forget to subscribe to the show, and if you are enjoying what you hear please leave a review on iTunes.
Links and Resources:
Paley Rothman
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