Recharging Your Personal Life During the Divorce Process with Guest Karen M. Pierce

by | Apr 4, 2019 | Podcasts

 

You can find Karen here:

KarenMPierce.com

[email protected]

Karen Pierce On Linked In

Karen Pierce on Instagram

Show Notes:

[01:52] Who is Karen and what does she do?

[02:40] Karen’s background and how she tried to reconcile her own parents.

[03:57] Karen’s personal relationship boundaries and marriage expectations.

[05:12] Working with clients which come from a broken relationship.

[07:34] Figure out your identity, who you are and being OK with yourself.

[09:37] Features of a co-dependent or needy relationship.

[12:16] How to prioritize what to work on for yourself after a divorce.

[12:59] Common struggles for women of different age groups in relationship to a divorce.

[15:09] Pivotal moments for children experiencing divorce.

[18:10] Putting boundaries on children, productive time and time to enjoy life.

[21:35] Planning for “me” time.

[24:12] Scheduling related to productive time management.

[27:34] The work life balance: how much of your personal life should you sacrifice for work life?

[29:39] Prioritizing your time, especially in time of family crisis.

[31:14] Boundaries, compromise and your principles.

[33:24] Integrating your life and where you spend your time on a daily basis.

[36:15] Using your own parents as a model for your relationship.

[41:45] How Karen works with clients.

Links and Resources:

Kate’s show: The Divorce Survial Guide Podcast

Be a guest on Kate’s podcast

Take Kate’s 2 minute quiz here

Navigating the Legal and Emotional Aspects of Divorce

by | Mar 28, 2019 | Podcasts

You can find Kate here: Kate Anthony Linked In Show Notes: [03:57] The realism of divorce and the emotional toll that comes with divorce. [04:82] How emotions get in the way of making good legal choices when you are stuck in emotional turmoil. [06:37] Letting emotions get in the way of making decisions about your children. [08:34] Advocating for clients and giving them a reality check to make sure the client understands the process. [10:43] Looking at the facts and law when creating your divorce decree. [11:54] The cost and process of litigating a custody case. [15:32] Kate’s emotional attachment to her home and why you shouldn’t fight for your house. [17:75] Considerations when budgeting for two households instead of one household after divorce. [19:72] Collaborative divorce as an alternative to litigation. [21:82] DIY divorce and the loopholes associated with handling your divorce on your own [23:47] What you need to know before you file for divorce. [26:42] The list of what’s important to you in your divorce. [28:47] Meeting people where they are emotionally. [29:62] Some jurisdictions require a waiting time when you are separated. [31:37] Choosing how your relationship looks after your divorce. [34:72] Giving time to catch up with the emotional shock of divorce. [36:57] Being flexible and not shattering your partner. [37:42] When a partner could be physical, make sure to have another person present when talking to your spouse [39:57] Basic checklist of what you will need to consider during your divorce. [42:32] Do the emotional work to create a better you to not pass on personal trauma to your children and break the cycle. Links and Resources: Kate’s show: The Divorce Survial Guide Podcast Be a guest on Kate’s podcast Take Kate’s 2 minute quiz here

Our Family Wizard – Online Communication Tools for Parents with guest Jai Kissoon

by | Mar 21, 2019 | Podcasts, Uncategorized

You can find Our Family Wizard here: Our Family Wizard Our Family Wizard on Facebook @OurFamilyWizard on Twitter Our Family Wizard on Pinterest Our Family Wizard on Instagram Our Family Wizard on Vimeo Our Family Wizard on YouTube Show Notes: [02:00] In 2001, Jai was a senior in college, and his mom practiced family law. His mother’s cousin had just experienced his first Christmas as a divorced parent, and he and his wife had a miscommunication about vacation plans. [03:16] Jai’s mom asked him if he knew of any technology solutions for this situation. [03:30] He realized that there was a need and wanted to create a tool for divorced families who are sharing parenting responsibilities. [03:44] He wrote the business plan for the world’s first co-parenting platform when he was a senior in college. His parents and her cousin and his wife all helped with input, and the company was created. [04:56] They worked with 40 high-conflict families to refine the process and learn about the process. [05:26] After two years of using the site, none of the high-conflict families had to go back to court except for one family who stopped using the site. [06:14] The goal is to help families from having to return to court for things that are easily manageable. [07:29] Features include a calendar that offers access and documentation that you won’t find in traditional calendar tools. [08:17] You can create a parenting schedule up to eight weeks with a repeating pattern. [08:49] You can also have multiple schedules. Both parents have access. [09:43] Every step is documented. An when changes happen there is a notification. [10:41] There is also a message board. It’s only family communication and everything is documented even when the messages are read. [11:50] Children get access on a limited schedule. [12:36] There is a tool to keep track of expenses. Payments can also be made directly through the system. [15:03] This is a desktop software and a mobile app. [16:12] With the calendar you can’t delete events, and there is a journal function and users can choose who sees the information. [17:24] There is a tone meter that interprets the emotion of the users input. It helps people to not say things that will set off the other parent. It is similar to AI. [20:04] It allows users to pause and take a breath before sending the message. [21:38] There is a trade swap feature to adjust scheduling. [22:23] The infobank tracks everything from doctors to other needs like clothing sizes. [24:08] Having all of the information out there, the less control and manipulation happens. [25:02] You can also upload pictures, reports, etc. This stuff would go in my files. [26:13] You can grant professionals different levels of access. The records are really helpful with court cases. There is also easy PDF presentations that can be printed out. [28:18] Verified documents are also available. [29:12] Professionals can upload documents, but the options are shared or private. [30:28] When a parent signs up they contact the other parent to get them set up and connected. [30:59] It’s $99 a year for each parent. Veterans get a buy one get one free discount. [31:38] There is also a fee waiver program if you qualify for a court’s fee waiver. [32:48] It doesn’t have to be court ordered to use the site. [33:52] Go to the website and signup, then you can use the app for free. [34:49] If you have questions reach out to support and talk to someone. [35:15] This tool can be implemented anytime through the divorce process. Do you have any topics that you would like me to cover in future shows? Let me know in the comments below. Don’t forget to subscribe to the show, and if you are enjoying what you hear please leave a review on iTunes. Links and Resources: Our Family Wizard Our Family Wizard on Facebook @OurFamilyWizard on Twitter Our Family Wizard on Pinterest Our Family Wizard on Instagram Our Family Wizard on Vimeo Our Family Wizard on YouTube

Top 8 Changes to Family Law with the Passage of the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act with Guest Eric Rollinger

by | Mar 14, 2019 | Podcasts

You can find Eric here: Stein Sperling Eric Rollinger on LinkedIn Show Notes: [04:50] Eric is a tax attorney at Stein Sperling. He does tax controversy work and litigation support work primarily in a divorce setting. [05:38] Alimony isn’t the only thing affected by the new tax laws. There are many other changes to the tax cut and jobs act or TCJA. [06:23] The change that took place for alimony has switched who can deduct the alimony payment. Alimony is not deductible by the payor, and it is not considered income for the recipient. [07:25] This is the only change that took effect January 1st of 2019. Most of the other changes took effect January 1st of 2018. [08:22] Sadly making alimony not taxable is less incentive for paying higher alimony. [09:53] Alimony payments before TCJA took effect still follow the old law. [12:27] Alimony is a defined term in the IRS code. It has to be paid in cash and to the former spouse or on the former spouse’s behalf. [14:25] Maryland has a default law that says the payment stop on the death of the recipient. [16:23] What qualifies as a written instrument? Defined in Section 71 subsection B. These are divorce decrees, marital settlement agreements, or agreements incident to a divorce. [17:28] The US tax court says a written instrument doesn’t need to satisfy certain requirements. [18:52] Be careful about written exchanges with a soon-to-be former spouse. [20:26] It’s likely that prenuptial agreements don’t qualify. [24:27] Attorney’s fees are no longer tax deductible. A lot of items that used to be deductible are no longer deductible. [26:42] This tax cut expires in 2025 will go back to what the law was in 2017. [27:22] Standardized deductions. When people don’t itemize, they take the standard deduction. Some itemized deductions have been taken away but the standard deduction has been raised. It has almost doubled for most filing statuses. [29:11] Personal and dependent exemptions have also been changed. From 2018 to 2025, the personal exemption and the dependency exemption are now zero. [31:44] Shared custody can impact the dependent exemption. It becomes a race to file the tax return first and claim the children as your dependent. If there is a lack of agreement, whoever has more nights with the children gets to claim the exemption. [33:34] The IRS instructions and the law may be different. The statute says the custodial parent takes the exemption. [35:26] It’s important to know who has more time with the children during the year. [39:23] The child tax credit. The TCJA doubled the child tax credit to $2000. [40:17] The best tax code benefit is a refundable tax credit. Then a non-refundable credit, an off the top deduction, and an itemized deduction. [40:40] Credits are better than deductions, because it’s a dollar for dollar tax reduction. [41:56] The credit begins to phase out at $400,000 of income. [43:34] A child has to be 17 or younger in order to be claimed as a tax credit. You also have to bare a relationship with that child. [46:45] Another big change is the limit on mortgage interest deductions is now $750,000 as opposed to $1,000,000. This doesn’t apply to people who have already purchased their homes. [50:04] In the past, you could deduct up to $100,000 of home equity indebtedness interest. Now it is not allowed. It’s not grandfathered in going forward. [53:59] 529 plans. These are college savings plans in a tax free vehicle with after tax dollars. The growth is not taxable if it is used for qualified education expenses. [56:41] Starting in 2018, this money can also be used for elementary or secondary education. [57:07] Out-of-pocket school expenses may be deductible. These 529 plans can have extreme tax benefits at the state level. Do you have any topics that you would like me to cover in future shows? Let me know in the comments below. Don’t forget to subscribe to the show, and if you are enjoying what you hear please leave a review on iTunes. Links and Resources: Top Ten Mistakes to Avoid Making During a Divorce Post Divorce Financial Checklist Post Divorce Financial Tips with guest Heather Locus Repeal of Alimony Law – 75 Years in the Making Merrill Edge 529 Plans 529 Plan State Tax Calculator

Post Divorce Financial Tips with guest Heather Locus

by | Feb 28, 2019 | Podcasts

You can find Heather here:

Balasa Dinverno Foltz, LLC (BDF)

BDF Important Disclosure Information

Heather Locus on LinkedIn

@HeatherLocus on Twitter

Heather Locus on Forbes

Show Notes:

[03:30] Heather is an owner at a private wealth management firm that manages about 4 billion in assets. She leads the Divorce Practice Group and helps people through all aspects of divorce.

[03:52] They often start by helping people hire the right team and professionals that they need. They also help give clarity on when someone should settle.

[04:15] They also help people understand the agreement and audit the agreement on a yearly basis. Then they help people create the next chapter of their lives on their own terms.

[04:32] Heather went through a divorce 8 years ago. After getting divorced, Heather realized that there was so much more they could do to help divorcing men and women.

[05:52] They help people make decisions and also help people know when they don’t have to make a decision.

[06:17]  After the divorce is done, they are a key partner for financial decisions going forward.

[07:15] The first thing people should do post-divorce is remain kind to themselves and have grace.

[08:02] After a divorce, there is time for all of the emotions that you couldn’t deal with during the process to come up. The ripple effect is often overwhelming and unexpected. The first thing you should do is pause and understand that this is normal.

[08:59] The marital settlement agreement is the key document on the financial perspective. This will detail property settlement, income, and obligations. It’s a good idea to go through this document one more time with your attorney.

[09:28] It’s important to have a road map and an ongoing audit.

[11:02] If a couple works with a good team during the marriage, it’s possible that they can keep that team. Sometimes both spouses will need a higher level of expertise.

[13:46] With assets and investments you really need to understand how things are titled. You also need to be aware of the tax ramifications before transferring assets.

[14:25] Set up a taxable account in your name or in your trust. Then you will probably need an IRA and all paperwork so your advisor knows how to transfer things properly.

[15:34] It’s critical that people understand what is still in their name and keep getting credit reports and following up after a divorce.

[16:50] Make sure joint accounts are closed, so you are not liable to a credit card company. Don’t just look for a zero balance you want it to say account closed.

[20:56] It’s also important to work with a mortgage professional who is experienced with divorce.

[22:38] A qualified domestic relations order or QDRO is a government provision that allows retirement accounts to be split without tax ramifications.

[23:58] You will need a specialist, because there are plan specific rules.

[32:06] Strategies for estate planning. Hire a professional. Power of attorney is for healthcare and finances. Most people don’t change wills and trusts during a divorce process. After your divorce, update your power of attorney and wills and trusts.

[37:22] It’s also important to have a provision for life insurance in case of disability or death. Sometimes insurance is required by the settlement agreement.

[40:33] According to COBRA laws, a divorced spouse can continue their insurance coverage for 36 months. Even if the employee’s spouse leaves.

[42:05] Most states also have spousal continuation.

[46:15] Splitting assets is an adjustment. Heather encourages couples to have healthy conversations with their children about money. They need to know how things might change and what the budget looks like.

[48:18] Once you get through the divorce, you need to understand what cash you have available. You should have at least six to twelve months of living expenses as an emergency fund.

[49:16] A financial affidavit is also a really important document for your financial advisor to see.

[50:07] There are a lot of potential tax ramifications with divorce. Make sure your tax attorney gets a copy of your MSA.

[51:29] With new tax laws, it’s more important than ever for CPA’s to understand the MSA.

[52:11] Capital gains is owning an asset for more than a year and getting a lower tax rate which is typically 15%. Ordinary income is taxed at your marginal rate or highest rate from your tax bracket. It’s important to hold assets if you can.

[53:23] If you are receiving taxable spousal support, you qualify to make an IRA contribution. This empowers a divorced spouse and lets them know that their contributions are important.

[54:49] With the new tax laws, this contribution won’t be possible.

[55:31] Make smart decisions one-step-at-a-time to create the next chapter in your life.

Do you have any topics that you would like me to cover in future shows? Let me know in the comments below. Don’t forget to subscribe to the show, and if you are enjoying what you hear please leave a review on iTunes.

Links and Resources:

Balasa Dinverno Foltz, LLC (BDF)

BDF Important Disclosure Information

Heather Locus on LinkedIn

@HeatherLocus on Twitter

Heather Locus on Forbes

Divorce Planning: Splitting Assets in a Divorce by Heather Locus

Post Divorce Financial Checklist

Webinars:

When I Do Becomes I Don’t:  Five Strategies for a Financially Responsible Divorce  – best for families at beginning or middle of divorce ~ 25 minutes.

The Financially Responsible Woman: Five Strategies for a Full Life – perfect for women who have just finalized a divorce or any woman who wants to take control of her finances ~ 12 minutes.

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Estate Planning after a Divorce with guest Michelle Chapin

by | Feb 14, 2019 | Podcasts

You can find Michelle here: Paley Rothman Attorneys at Law Michelle Chapin on LinkedIn (301)951-9353 [email protected] Show Notes: [01:53] Michelle advises clients on how to leave their assets at death and how to protect themselves if they are incapacitated. She also helps clients with minor children name guardians in their will or if they are incapacitated. [02:33] She also helps clients who have modest means who need trusts. [03:10] Everyone needs an estate plan whether they are married or divorced. You should want to leave your estate to someone in particular. [03:53] Estate planning is state-specific. Michelle represents Maryland, DC, and Virginia. It’s best to have local counsel wherever you reside. [04:54] When people aren’t getting divorced the estate plan is a joint representation. [07:26] Conflict has to be waived in order to represent just one of the spouses. [07:55] An estate plan isn’t just your will. It could also include an irrevocable trust where your next named trustee could step in for your capacity. [08:41] People also require a financial power of attorney and a medical directive. You also want to update beneficiary designations for retirement benefits and life insurance. [10:23] A divorce usually affects all of these documents, because people normally name their spouse in every position. [10:48] Some states have laws where if your spouse is in a fiduciary position and you get divorced that position will be revoked. [11:08] You don’t want to rely on state law. You want to have your own plan and do what’s best for your needs. [11:28] A fiduciary is a person that you’ve named to act in your best interest. [14:38] Proactively update your destinations upon divorce. [16:18] You can revoke a will by tearing it up. You can also create a new will and include language that revokes your older will. It’s still a good idea to destroy your old will or tear it up. [18:41] They hold their clients wills free of charge, so they don’t accidentally get revoked. A fireproof box is the best place to keep a will. [20:26] If you divorce, your Inherited property isn’t divided. The augmented estate – if you disinherit a spouse, they can make a claim against your estate when you die. [22:26] A prenuptial agreement can be used to keep property separate after divorce. [22:49] The estate can be made a gift for the person’s children and put in a trust. [23:40] If people are separated, they need to remove their spouse as the fiduciary of their estate plan. [24:54] A claim can be made against the estate, and the estate can’t close until the claim is resolved. [26:15] You can name whoever you want as the guardian of your children, but the biological parent is always the default guardian.  You would have to show something in court proving that this person is unfit. [28:09] When getting divorced, it might be a good idea to change financial advisors. [28:40] You can update your plan possibly before your divorce. [30:23] It’s crucial that people think about their estate plan as part of their divorce. [31:25] Take control of your own estate plan and don’t let these things fall through the cracks. Do you have any topics that you would like me to cover in future shows? Let me know in the comments below. Don’t forget to subscribe to the show, and if you are enjoying what you hear please leave a review on iTunes. Links and Resources: Paley Rothman Attorneys at Law Michelle Chapin on LinkedIn (301)951-9353 [email protected]